Happy 40th Mercy Ships...

Congratulations Mercy Ships!  40 years ago, on the 5th of October 1978, the first Mercy Ship was purchased.  As a 1 year old at the time, I was oblivious that this ship would one day become my childhood home. However, just a year later, my family joined the M/V Anastasis in Greece and I had the privilege of spending the next 14 and a half years onboard. To date, the Anastasis is still the place I have lived the longest, surpassing The Netherlands. However, Sierra Leone is catching up with 13 and a half years and counting.

I was the first child to go all the way from nursery through 12th grade onboard and although it wasn’t always easy, especially when I was the only child in my grade, I am so grateful that I grew up on the ship. What an amazing experience. From playing sticks, foursquare and sardines on the ship to swimming in the pool, playing basketball on the dock and roller-skating on the Aft deck. From sleeping outside during sails, watching dolphins swim alongside the ship, life boat drills and star gazing to having ‘fun nights’, ball room dancing, helping in the snack bar and watching movies in the lounge. I had the privilege of meeting so many people but also the heartache of constantly saying goodbye. The opportunity to visit over 40 countries was amazing, but also means some of my childhood memories are a bit of a blur in terms of where (in which country) a particular memory occurred. Being a part of community outreach including painting schools, building a playground, assisting in community clinics and spending time on the ward with patients coming for surgery, were defining moments.

Sierra Leone was one of the countries I visited as a child in 1992-1993. In our school yearbook that year I reflected on my time in Sierra Leone and ended with the following memory:

“I remember sitting down under the little palm-branch covered hut among the sick children and their hopeful moms. The sight of those children tugged at my heart. Holding a hopeless and suffering, measles inflicted child in my arms, after watching two other kids die from the same thing, made me realize how fortunate I really am. I also know that with God's strength I have something great that I can give to the dying children in the world today."

I know this was very idealistic, but that experience along with the life changing surgeries I witnessed on the ship, inspired me to pursue medicine. I was exposed to people who genuinely cared about others and one of my life heroes is still onboard, extending compassion and humility to the patients that come his way. In just a few days Dr. Gary will meet 7 patients that I am sending from the clinic I work at in Freetown to the Africa Mercy in Conakry for cleft lip/palate surgery. It is an honour to help these children on their journey and to partner with Mercy Ships. Although the M/V Anastasis was retired in 2007, the Africa Mercy and the Mercy Ships community still feel very much like home.

Happy moment: connecting families...

Today’s HAPPY MOMENT was when I introduced two families to each other, each with a baby with a cleft lip and palate. 

In a country where children with birth defects are seen as “devils”, stigma and shame are daily realities and there are physical challenges in caring for a child with a cleft lip and palate, it can be very isolating for the parents. Knowing that they are not alone and feeling supported is often a game changer! 

It’s always a delight to introduce families to each other and witness the hope and encouragement they experience when they see that they are not alone. I also love showing photos of children who have received surgery and watch the parents’ faces light up when they realize that their child really can be transformed through surgery. It is a joy and a privilege to provide ongoing support and care for these children. They hold a special place in my heart.  

E’s mom confessed later in the morning that when she is at home in her community, she often feels lonely, ashamed and worried, but when she comes to our clinic, she feels cared for, encouraged and hopeful. It warms my heart to know that our clinic provides a safe space and even though we have formal weekly visits for weight checks, she knows that she is welcome at any time. 

I pray that these two little ones continue to grow well and that their lives are amazing testimonies of God’s love and hope. 

“You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you. The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day. Your thoughts—how rare, how beautiful! God, I’ll never comprehend them! I couldn’t even begin to count them— any more than I could count the sand of the sea. Oh, let me rise in the morning and live always with you!” Psalm 139

  

#happymoment #everychildmatters #hoperestored #transforminglives #cleftlipandpalatepatients #specialplaceinmyheart  #showsomeoneyoucare 

Tragic loss of a 1-week old...

Within 5 days of each other two newborns with cleft lips and palates were admitted to the Children’s hospital. You have followed the story of one of them. Let me tell you a bit more about the other one.

A week ago I was called by an obstetrician that he delivered a girl with a cleft lip and palate by C-Section. I told him I would see the family first thing Monday morning. However, that morning there were no relatives around and I didn't want to break the news to the mother (on the maternity ward) without a support structure around her. You see, she had not yet seen her child and no one had mentioned the defect to her. Finally on Wednesday, the father and aunty came while I was at the hospital. I talked to them first. They had seen the child right after birth and already accepted the child as theirs. The next step was to tell the mother. She is only 16 and this is her first child. Obviously, she was heartbroken. It was a difficult conversation but we tried to encourage her. I saw her again on Thursday on the maternity ward. She smiled and I sat with her for ten minutes. We talked. She was still unsure. 

On Friday, I met with the first family, with the little boy who was almost rejected. I had taken them to the Special Care to weigh the little boy. It just so happened that the 16-year-old mom was also in the Special Care unit. So, the moms had the opportunity to meet and, for about 30 minutes, we all sat there and talked. The little baby boy and the little baby girl, both with cleft lips and palates, were there, side by side. One already accepted by his parents, the other one still waiting for acceptance from his mom. I was hoping that this would bring her one step closer.

A few hours later, the family told me that the little girl had been discharged. I asked them to come back on Monday to see me. The other family was also due to come back. These children need good follow-up.

However, today, this little girl’s father called me. He had clearly accepted his daughter and sounded very concerned. She had a fever. I told them to go back to the hospital, which they did. He then called me to say they hadn't been seen yet. I told them exactly what to do. A few hours later he called me and said that she was being treated. Sadly, at 22:30 this evening my phone rang again. It was her father and right away I knew what he was going to tell me. His little girl died only minutes earlier. He is heartbroken. The mother is in shock. Tragic. A very young couple trying to accept a child into their lives with a very stigmatized defect, only to lose her a week later. My heart breaks for this family. I am at a loss for words. I still hope to see them on Monday and pray that I can offer some kind of encouragement and hope to them.

Little boy with cleft lip/palate returns...

I am pleased to say that I saw the cleft lip and palate baby again on Thursday, a week after he was discharged. Mom, dad and baby were doing well. I was so proud of the parents. It was amazing to watch the dad help the mom prepare the formula and observe the mom feeding her son with so much love and patience. A miracle.

During the week that this family was at home, another child with a cleft lip and palate was born at the hospital. A little girl. Instead of experiencing the joy of a healthy baby, another family was in shock and confused. Another opportunity for me to talk to them about the condition, the acceptance of the child, the support they needed to give each other. I saw the opportunity to connect the two families. I was not sure if that would work. In the end it did, but it wasn't straight forward and somewhat happened by chance. I had hope. Hope that this child would be accepted as well, and hope that she would thrive. Things turned out differently than I had hoped... 

Acceptance of a little boy...

“A little boy arrived at the hospital yesterday, only a few hours old. Already he was unwanted. Born with a cleft lip and palate he is seen as a 'devil child'. Mom & child are admitted and I am praying mom grows to love her son over the next few days. I brought in the mom of a former cleft patient today in the hopes of bringing some encouragement.”  - from my Facebook status 6 days ago

The good news is, at the age of 4 days, this little boy went home - with his parents. While he was in hospital I went to the special care baby unit every day to talk to his mother, check on the baby, and show mom pictures of her baby boy. We talked, she cried, we sat in silence, I put my hand on her shoulder, I showed her pictures. I think that by the end of the 4 days she was over the initial shock. She gained confidence in feeding her child and was assured that an operation would be possible.

The parents’ biggest fear of course was the rejection and verbal abuse they would face when returning to their community. I can’t say I blame them. This is a very realistic fear. There are so many absurd ideas surrounding children born with cleft lips and palates it is unbelievable. It could literally lead to the family being shunned and thrown out of their community. When they left my office on Thursday I could tell that they were ready to face their community. I am sure they were still worried, but the smiles on their faces gave me a glimmer of hope that they have accepted this little baby boy as their son. My hope is that the parents will be surrounded by people who care. People who can encourage and support them. People who can see past the outward appearance and see that this child has a lot of potential. I can only hope that this little 1 week old is snuggled up in his mother’s arms right now. And I pray that when I see them on Thursday they will be positive and full of hope. And, of course, that my little friend is thriving.